National Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day on October 15 offers a day of remembrance to parents, family, and friends for pregnancy loss and infant death.

 

Burying my daughter was one of the hardest things I’ve ever been through and local support groups became my lifeline during the months that followed. I felt like her short life had meaning when I successfully lobbied for a local hospital’s perinatal loss support group to join with other hospitals to make it a community group instead. 

 

The joint project operated for many years helping parents and siblings cope with the aftermath of losing a baby. 

 

 

Pregnancy loss and infant death may include but are not limited to miscarriage, stillbirth, SIDS, or the death of a newborn. Since 1 in 4 pregnancies end in loss, many families know the grief of this kind of loss. It’s often not spoken about, and yet, those who mourn often need support and understanding. The experience is painful and sometimes overwhelming. 

 

Communities and organizations across the country show support with candlelight vigils, walks, and other ceremonies. I attended many Walks to Rememberat our local zoo and was dismayed to discover the support group in my hometown had disbanded while I’d been living out of state. 

 

Reaching out to the hospital where I’d had my children, I discovered a new bereavement group was being put in place but they had zero interest in working with me or other community organizations and hospitals. They were selective in who would receive information and help, a travesty for grieving parents especially in one of only 8 states who have enacted the public proclamation of October 15 as the permanent observance of Pregnancy and Infant Loss Remembrance Day (PAILRD). 

 

Fortunately, grieving parents of infants have been welcomed into other support groups for losses of children of all ages like Compassionate Friends and While We’re Waiting. 

 

There are also online support groups for bereaved parents of infants. Hope Mommies Community has virtual and in-person support groups with a February retreat planned for parents in Mineral Wells, Texas. Aaliyah in Action is a non-profit formed out of Washington, D.C. by Liz O’Donnell, a mom whose maternity leave was rescinded when she gave birth to a full-term stillborn baby. 

 

Not only was she instrumental in getting legislation passed for women in this situation, in the last three years she has single-handedly crafted over 1,900 packages to families who have experienced perinatal or neonatal loss.

 

Call 211 for local support services in your area. Visit the organizations above or nationalshare.org to find support and ways to support others with pregnancy and infant loss.